Sister, Sister
by NightRanger85
Summary: They look alike, they think alike, they drive poor housebroken EVA pilots crazy alike...
1. Chapter 1

**Sister, Sister...**

A NightRanger/Gainax Fanworks Production

Disclaimer: I don _not_ own Evangelion, or any other copyrighted material in this work of fiction. Hell, I don't even own the DVDs!

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It was a relatively normal day for one Ikari Shinji, 3rd Child and EVA pilot. First to awaken, first to wash, first to the kitchen...

"You are two minutes and eighteen seconds later than yesterday, Shinji."

...That's where things were most definitely _not_ normal. The enigmatic young woman had only turned up a week ago wandering around what was left of the 40th District, near where fellow pilot Ayanami Rei had once lived. How she had gotten there, nobody knew.

Even so, the entity known as Kosmos simply didn't want to go away. And Shinji's conscience wouldn't allow him to ignore another's distress.

"_Ohaiyo_ Kosmos-san," he said as he began breakfast for his roommates. Things had been cramped enough with just himself, Misato, and Asuka. Then Rei had been forced to move in when Unit-01's massacre of the MP Series had pulverized her apartment block. The addition of the blue-haired android pushed the little apartment to near its limit.

By now, Shinji had resigned himself to making space for himself in a corner of the living room; Rei and Kosmos were taking up his old room, as Asuka's room was simply too full of the German pilot's stuff for anyone else to bunk with. Not even Kosmos had wanted to share Misato's room, something about alcoholic content in the atmosphere and fuel/air munitions.

It had taken nearly a half an hour for Shinji to talk a drunken Misato out of trying to shoot the older bluehead.

Another big issue that arose had been that Kosmos looked young enough to still be in public school. The logistical part of the dilemma was overcome easily enough, but the next problem was a bit more significant; namely her behavior. If anything, Kosmos was even more literal than Rei. Up to and including modes of dress and propriety.

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"GAAH! K-Kosmos-san!"

"I am not entirely familiar with this particular garment."

Working desperately to keep himself from freezing, poor Shinji answered as best he could. "T-that's a b-b-bra, Kosmos-san."

Dainty fingers pulled at a strap, making Shinji swallow dryly. Even Misato's lingerie didn't fit perfectly. "I am unfamiliar with its function Shinji."

"I-i-it's f-for s-s-support, K-Kosmos-san," said the heavily blushing Shinji. "N-now can you please get out?"

"I require the mirror, Shinji."

"But I'm in the bath!"

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Blushing faintly at the memory, Shinji shook his head; no-one had gotten any peace that day. After that, Shinji had spent the next week and a half drilling everything he knew about polite behavior into the android. Rei had provided some greatly appreciated assistance. "Is there anything specific that you wanted?" Kosmos appeared to think for a moment. "I believe…steamed rice with sauce would be most beneficial." "Alright," said Shinji, shrugging.

Just _how_ Kosmos was able to ingest food was beyond him; all he knew was that she could.

Having started the rice, the boy began preparing some vegetarian tofu for the second blue-haired girl of the apartment and a large helping of bacon and eggs for his other roomates.

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"_Ohaiyo, onee-san_."

Puzzled, Kosmos cocked her head slightly to the side. "I am an android; it is impossible for me to be related to you."

"I am simply attempting to 'act naturally', _onee-san_," said Rei, a towel over her shoulders. "Shinji-kun say there will be fewer questions about your presence that way." Rei sat down at the table next to her erstwhile 'older sister' as she watched the one male of the house work diligently away in the kitchenette. "Oh, _ohaiyo_ Aya...Rei-san, I didn't see you there," said aforementioned male as he balanced the platters of rice and tofu. "I only just finished my shower, Shinji-kun." Indeed, the oversized blue sweater Rei used as pajamas served adequately for early morning attire (it had taken Shinji a week to get Rei to put on clothes at night).

"Do either of you know if Asuka is up yet?"

Kosmos shook her head. "Unlikely. My sensors detected a human female entering the apartment at 0229 this morning. She seemed...agitated."

Both Shinji and Rei nodded knowingly; they had both overheard Horaki Hikari talking about the blind date her older sister had set up for the redhead. They could only wonder as to the condition the poor man had been left in, as stressed was the understatement of the century for Asuka.

Kosmos had been perfectly willing to translate Asuka's tirade after her first meeting with the android. Shinji told her not to bother; he had a pretty good idea of what most of it was.

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At this point, Shinji was half out of his mind. First was Asuka ragging on him for the bacon being thirty seconds overdone, then getting Kosmos to accept the idea of attending public school. Then came the discovery that it was _his_ school that she would be attending, 'tho she would be in the senior's wing. And for the final act, last but not least...

"Buttons are supposed to allow adjustment, Shinji...kun." "T-t-that's not the point, Kosmos-san."

The fact that the school uniforms tended to be either too loose or too tight, particularly in the chest area.

"...but you're not supposed to have them completely undone!" Kosmos simply looked at the boy. "Then would you do them for me?"

"I think you broke Shinji-kun, _onee-san_."


	2. Her First Day At School

Internally, the beleaguered 3rd Child sighed heavily; in retrospect, he should have realized that they would find out

**Sister, Sister...**

A NightRanger/Gainax Fanworks Production

Ch.2

Disclaimer: Yes, yes, I get it, Kosmos! I don't own you or EVA. Happy? Now can you _please_ put that scythe down!?

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Internally, the beleaguered 3rd Child sighed heavily; in retrospect, he should have realized that they would have found out.

"YOU NEVER TOLD US AYANAMI HAD A SISTER!!"

Yep, you guessed it: Touji and Kensuke had finally cornered him about the older bluehead that had come in with Rei; it had been fated from the start. Obviously, they wanted to know _everything_ about the new addition to the graduating class. Shinji could almost see the images of lingerie-clad Kosmos dancing around in his friends' heads.

"She'd had to move here when her place was wiped out in the Hiroshima-2 Terminal bombing." Shinji didn't know whether to groan or laugh hysterically, as Misato had spent five minutes over a bottle of Black Sea vodka to think up a cover story. "Her relationship to Ayanami-san had been mostly kept secret." "Bet the Red-headed Demon loved that," said Touji, a knowing look on his face. "Touji, you don't _want_ to know what Asuka said about it."

Nervously glancing towards the redhead, both Touji and Kensuke noticed Asuka grumbling darkly to herself as she traded messages with someone.

"Dude, she looks pissed." Shinji gave Touji a look with a raised brow. "Any more than she is normally?" Touji thought about this for a second. "Good point, Shin-man."

"So, what's up with the Red Devil's funk anyways?" Kensuke gestured over towards a still fuming Asuka. Shinji cringed. "She just found out that Kosmos-san beat her out as the hottest girl in the school."

"Ouch."

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"So _you're_ the new girl." Kosmos looked up from her notebook computer at the freckled brunette. "Yes, I am. Do you require anything Horaki-san?"

"No, just wanted to say 'welcome to Tokyo-3!'. Oh, and call me Kodama. When I hear 'Horaki-san' I think my younger sister Hikari." Kodama could barely tell, but she was able to recognize a spark of interest in her eye. "The student representative of 2-A?" "That's my Hikari-chan!"

"The same Hikari-san that accompanies Asuka-san?"

Kodama gave her a proud smile. "Yup!"

Kosmos appeared to think for a moment. "Is there a reason why Hikari-san enjoys the company of canines?"

This brought Kodama up short. Dogs? What did dogs have to do with her sister? Then again, Hikari _did_ always want to get a puppy eventually...

"I'm sorry, Kosmos-san, but what did you mean by dogs?" "I am referring to Suzuhara-kun and Aida-kun calling Asuka-san a 'demon bitch'."

"Kodama-san?"

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"C'mon, Shin-man! Details! Give us _details_!"

"Or at least her sizes!"

Shinji sighed for fifty-eighth time that day as he ventured up to the roof for lunch. Like his friends, the boys of 2-A were chatting eagerly about Rei's 'older sister' in the senior's wing. Only Touji and Kensuke wouldn't stop asking about it.

"You live with _four_ hot chicks, Shinji! You've _got_ to know _something_!"

"Don't cop out on us, Shin-man! Give."

Oh how he regretted telling them that he was the designated clothes launderer...

"Shinji-kun?"

Surprised, Shinji turned around to the sight of Ayanami Rei. "What it is, Rei-san?"

Rei handed over a small notepad. "Misato-san told me to remind you that we need to go clothes shopping."

Looking through the notepad, Shinji's face suddenly turned a deep crimson.

Nonplussed, Rei continued. "She has said that _onee-san_ is too big for-"

Shinji slapped a hand over her mouth before she could say anything else. "T-t-thanks, Rei-san, I think I'll r-remember."

A pair of jaws dropped.

Now he _knew_ that telling them had been a _bad_ idea.

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Her locker was full.

It wasn't supposed to be full.

Perplexed, Kosmos examined the personal storage unit (locker) designated to be hers; the students' notebook computers were certainly an investment, but she didn't think that hers required such extensive packaging.

With purpose in mind, she sought out the most informative companion.

"Ikari-kun?" "GAH!"

Apparently, Ikari-kun had been occupied.

"Oh, h-hi, Kosmos-san," he said, rubbing his neck.

"Your vitals are elevated, Ikari-kun. Do you require medical attention?" "N-no, Kosmos-san. I was just startled, that's all," he said. "Did you need something?" Kosmos pointed to her overflowing locker. "It appears I require increased storage volume."

Groaning, Shinji buried his face in his hands. "Ikari-kun? Is there something wrong?"

"Not, Kosmos-san," he said with a sigh. "There's nothing wrong. I'm just kicking myself for not warning you about this."

Kosmos looked puzzled. "The human anatomy is not flexible enough to kick oneself, Ikari-kun." "Its a figure of speech, Kosmos-san." Shinji gestured at the locker. "Anyway, when a guy l-likes you, he'll usually send you a note of some sort."

Kosmos looked at her locker, then at Shinji again. "I am an android, Ikari-kun."

Shinji pinched the bridge of his nose. "Kosmos-san, guys will look at you and see...well...you," he said, a deep blush on his face.

"Then they consider me physically attractive?" She posed like she had observed Misato-san had when she'd gotten herself a new tank top.

Bright red, Shinji 'eeped' out a "Yes."

"Your temperature has risen by .451 degrees, Ikari-kun. I suggest you seek medical care."

Gripping his arm with surprising strength, Kosmos unceremoniously frog-marched him off to the school nurse.

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"A fever, Ayanami-kun?" "Yes, ma'am."

Sitting in one of the office's chairs, Shinji watched as the nurse and Kosmos discussed his condition. '_Since when could she pull Misato's glares?_'

"I checked him and Ikari-kun seems to be in perfect health."

"I had noticed that Ikari-kun seemed warmer than usual. Does that not indicate a fever?"

'_I __am__ right here, you know._'

"He may have simply have been embarrassed, Ayanami-kun." The nurse giggled. "Ikari-kun has always been the shy one."

'_Oh, thanks a lot..._'

"Anyway, I think you two are free to go," said the nurse

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"You know, I didn't think you were the type, Shin-chan. Rendezvous in the nurse's office?"

"MISATO!!"

Snickering into her beer, Katsuragi Misato, NERV's Director of Strategic Operations and erstwhile guardian to the Pilots mentally chalked up another tally on her Shin-chan. '_Yep, still got it!_'

Life had certainly been...interesting with the newest addition to their little home. True, Kosmos was very much like Rei. Whether that was a good thing or not she was still trying to figure out.

"I would appreciate your assistance, Shinji-kun."

'_Of course, Ko-chan has made life all the more interesting in this little place._'

In came both Rei and Kosmos. Apparently, someone had taken the two out shopping for swimsuits. Probably Rei, given how much effort Shinji had put into teaching the albino girl how to live life. '_And oh the fruit that effort bore..._' thought Misato as she watched the show.

Pen2 slapped his face with a flipper in exasperation as he watched his Food Provider pass out.

"Wark wark! Wark wark wark wark!" (Get the kid some pints over here dammit! I'm hungry!)

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Authors Notes:

The second chapter is finally done. Hopefully, I've been able to introduce Kosmos into the EVA-verse gradually enough. For those who wanted more background info in the 1st chapter, don't worry. I going to add flashbacks later on.

Admittedly, I don't know a great deal about _Xenosaga_ beyond the basic plot; I'll have to do some research before I think about trying to mix things up too much.

To Xed Alpha, that's kinda what I thought when I first saw Kosmos (I'd heard of Rei long before I'd heard of _Xenosaga_).

To 141fanficfan, you'll have to forgive me, what little about the Japanese language I know I picked up from other fanfiction.

To gunman, that's the reason I wanted to put Kosmos in with the EVA pilots in the first place. Her and Rei are so similar, I liked the idea of her and Rei inadvertently 'teaming up' to turn Tokyo-3 on its ear.

Speaking o' which, I was (and still am) considering if I should stick with Rei/Shinji or add Kosmos to make it a triangle. Pairing headaches aside, I _am_ still new to this.

JA MATTA!

-NightRanger


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